The British Asian Blog

Life as it is @tbablog

Category: Aspirations

Never Give Up

I remember Simren once said to me “…because you never give up”, upon me asking her what changed her mind about me.  If you have been following my blog over the years, you would have read my blog posts about how Simren and I met.

Our happenstance and subsequent encounters were full of troubles, fights and just odium.  She wanted nothing to do with me.  She hated the fact that I was actively and openly having relationships with women without pledge, including a very close friend of hers, she detested the fact that I was living a life where only one person mattered (me) and that my show of lavish, profligate lifestyle was just an ego booster, a statement I was making which demonstrated my insecurities and arrogance.  

This went on for years.  From myside, all I wanted was Simren.  I was prepared to go any lengths to get her and I was willing to change, all that she hated about me, for her.  In my books, that was a big statement.  If you want to know more about Simren and my relationship – just search for ‘Simren’ on my blog search field.

In the end, my desire to want her, my persistence and passion not to give up turned her hate into Love.

That’s the message I wanted to bring to you, never give up.

In life, I’ve been through highs and lows, I’ve been to thick and thins and I’ve been knocked down (almost out) on many a times.  One thing that I have done in all circumstances and situations is I never gave up.

It is true, the outcome(s) are not always clear and I’ve never been able to measure or gauge the end results in most cases but so long as you give it 100% and apply your faith, desire and persistence it’ll work out in your favour.

In ‘never give up’ attitude, at times, the longer you keep at it the stronger the emotions run to do just the opposite.  The fear of ‘not getting anywhere’ or ‘am I wasting my time’ just keeps wanting to knock you down.  The lack of results, in your favour, look grim and disheartening but you’ll soon realise that you are being conditioned not to accept failure as an option.  You are perfecting your character.  You are winning this battle.  You are learning and building your arsenal with relevant and valuable tools and skillsets, which otherwise you’d never experience.

I’ve touched on this before on previous blog posts and I’ll mention it again – it is germane.  I found myself at a boarding school hundreds of miles away from my family, at the age of 13.  Being a British Asian, and probably one of just a few colour students at a predominately affluent, wealthy and white boarding school meant that I wasn’t going to get it easy.  It wasn’t going to be easy and I needed to build myself up to learn and adopt to ‘never give up’.

Don’t be surprised to learn that when this morning, I received a phone call from my appointed solicitors/barristers that I’d been given the approval and the ‘go ahead’ for a very important venture to begin after almost 4 years of delay, I was jubilant yet realistic.  The uphill struggle, against all odds and despite all the ‘so called’ experts and their advice that it’ll ‘never happen and will never be approved’, I’ve gone ahead and proved to myself, yet again, a very important lesson ‘never give up’.

When I, briefly, spoke to Simren over the phone this lunch time, she mentioned it again “…because you never gave up” and if you are reading this blog post, and have come down to this far in reading what I have to write then go on a little further.  The next sentence you’ll read is probably the most important advice I could ever give you.

Never Give Up!

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Greatest Pleasure

Read the following, pause and think about it – then have your say:

My 100th Post

Thanks to WordPress, I was informed that my last post was my 100th one.  This, I feel, calls for a mini celebrations..

I would, therefore, like to take this opportunity to say ‘Thank You’ to each and every single one of you.  Finding the time, words and energy (in my current busy lifestyle) isn’t easy but people like you, regular followers, readers and contributors inspire me, and thus I’ve grown the confidence and aspiration to continue.

I feel that I need to make a few changes, since 100 is a good number and a milestone (albeit a small one in the grand scheme of things) I’m contemplating a number of options to bring about a positive change to this blog.  The very least I can do is play with the design and theme – personalizing it a little more.  I can experiment with a new, refreshing, approach to blogging and alter the blog content to capture more about British Asians ethos: the spirit and culture of British Asians and how the era or community has manifested in its attitudes and aspirations. So all these ideas have suddenly engulfed me and are going around in my head.

Once again I’d like to Thank y’all for making this possible and all I can say is ‘stay tuned’ for another challenge I set myself and put this blog through its paces and re-energies it.

The Wolf of Wall Street : You and Your Goal

(Just a rant) At times, I feel like I should, ram this quote and this picture down the throats of some people – who are simply not willing to put in the effort.

As the Wolf of Wall Street put it “The only thing standing between you and your goal is the bullshit story you keep telling yourself as to why you can’t achieve it” and damn me what an awesome quote this is.

Note:  If you haven’t seen this film or read the book – I instruct you to immediately stop whatever it is you are doing, go down to your local video/dvd store or book store and buy a copy and start to read it immediately when you leave the store – or – if you order online begin the second it drops through your letterbox.  This is important – this is how to do it.

 

11 June 2014: a short statement from The British Asian Blog

I fight on.

This part of my life is called ‘Rules Of Engagement’

Ever since I was a child, the one thing I was good at or rather ‘extremely’ good at was to get myself organised and ready for obstacles of tomorrow.  I was good at preparing myself, in all forms, for the future, especially in the face of new and different challenges presented to me and at times at extreme short notices.   Over time I’ve grown more confident, secure and positive in handling pressures that come with this, especially when stepping into unknown territory.  Today, I’m no different, and with age has come wisdom and a wealth of experience.  I’m still having to understand the limits of my will power.

You may have noted that my posts, here on this very blog have gotten fewer and more far between of late.

I arrived back in the UK on the 19th September, after spending a very long time in India, where I had the opportunity to visit Florida and Dubai.

Since being back, I’ve been, with great effort and perusal, trying to get myself organised – especially since the new challenges in my life will require more of my attention, time and effort.

Other than the new challenges in my life, which I have written about before, in October/November 2012 I made myself accept a new one.  In a weird way, this challenge was a shock to me that I had decided and accepted to do it.  It has a direct impact on blogging and my desire to write.  I purchased two separate domain names along with hosting solutions.  These two domain names were to become my second and third blog along with related twitter profiles.  These two new blogs went live in November 2012.  This blog ‘The British Asian Blog’ still remains my first one.  One fundamental difference with the two new domain names is that they don’t include the extension “.wordpress” in them.

I hear you!  Why would I create two new blogs when I was clearly neglecting this one?

Yes, it is true that this blog was with ‘intention’ neglected.  Not because I was put off from writing or blogging or that I couldn’t find the time considering how busy I generally am in life and it wasn’t a case of being obtuse.  In fact, the absolute truth is that I had focused all available time and energy, when not running my businesses or involved in new ventures, in churning out content for my new second and third blog and spending time playing about with SEO (Search Engine Optimisation) to help people discover the blog and its content more conveniently, of course online.

I hear you, again! What exactly are the other two blogs about?

Good question, and let me be honest.  This blog ‘The British Asian Blog’ was originally setup to fulfil a desire, and it was out of pure desire that I created a platform to voice my views on British Asians.  Since British Asians are making rapid forward progress it was my opportunity to talk about the Good, Bad and the Ugly vociferously, but overtime, I somehow have lost the focus and became wanton.  Instead of sticking to a dedicated area of interest, I began, without control to mix wide-ranging topics including my personal life and business interests, with posts concerning British Asians but the latter should have only every been published here.   I guess, one can argue that mixing a wide-ranging topics can be viewed as a British Asian life-style and what I go through would be a true representation of a British Asian or in other words, killing many birds with one stone, but I’m neither content nor satisfied with this, and so, two new blogs have been born as a result.

The new blogs (which I’ll refer to as ‘second’ and ‘third’ blog) have been created and executed to up a few levels in so far as blogging and writing is concerned, but also to get myself organised for the future.

The Second blog is intended for life writing and purely based on my private life.  The content is extremely well structured and is about reliving my life from as far back I can remember to the very present moment.  It contains memories of my childhood, my teenage years, my life at boarding school – the people I boarded with, lived with and where they are now and what they are doing, my family and friends, my acquaintances and the shenanigans, tomfoolery and waywardness I have got up to in the past and involved in right up until this very day, and everything else which is classed as private.

The Third blog is dedicated to my entrepreneurial side, and is purely based around understanding money, business, achievements, failures and how to be successful.  I use the word ‘successful’ loosely, as it is my belief that no one can ever achieve true success as the idea of success is based on individual interpretation.  The idea of this blog is extremely simple and with one, long-term, goal in mind – you see, you get people who spend a large chunk of their lives, be it hours, days, weeks or even months, reading and studying books written by wealthy people.  Wealthy people who claim to reveal their secrets.  Those individuals who get involved in reading their books or material often hope that their inspiration will rub off on them giving them that spark, confidence and know-how to go out and become equally successful and wealthy (and in some cases it does happen).  Well, I am not like that, and I don’t want to be a reader or customer of these books but an actual author of one.  The blog is dedicated to my experience and hard work from the very beginning till this very day.  The structure of the blog is simple but extremely effective.  It’s also a diary of how my new venture with my acquaintance has formed into a viable, prosperous, affluent and moneyed venture where already we have successfully launched in London and Delhi.  How I plan and organise to take it further.  I provide and make visible my views, tips and guidance to people who ask for my opinion along with an opportunity for readers/visitors to directly contact and engage with me.  The idea, as mentioned before, is to over time build up a credible platform with enough content for me to write it into a book or a series of books, hopefully.

The amazing part of all this is that since November last year, I’ve asked for help from a IT/Tech professional who works for me on a different business, to spend a little of his time playing with SEO for both blogs.  The chap understands SEO remarkably well and with him chipping in I’m glad to report that both blogs and associated twitter profiles have achieved and generated extremely large following and traffic since November 2012, especially the Third blog, much more than what I had in mind or expected and it isn’t serendipity.

So, where does this blog fit in?

Well, this blog will continue to operate as usual.  For now, my intention is to build up this blog to a reputable platform and continue to focus its content to British Asians.  The downside to this blog is that its platform is extremely limited, other than publishing content and tweaking the end-user interface; there isn’t much else I can do with it.  That said, going forward this blog will benefit from receiving equal amount of attention and focus from me in comparison to the Second and Third blog.  The long and short of it is that I have plans for this blog too.

In my world, nothing ever is by chance but orchestrated with intent.  As Steve Jobs and Apple quoted in one of their commercials in 1997 “The people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world are the ones who do” and that, my fellow people, sums it all up ‘perfectly‘.

Letter to my, then, teenage self

Letter to my younger self

Dude:

I’m writing to you using my Samsung Galaxy S3 smart phone.  Never you mind.

You’re 14 and you’re going to rock (later) in life.  So far it’s been notoriously dazzling.

Regards

The future You – Age 20-something.

P.S.  July and August of 2013 will be a key milestone and a turning point in your life in so far as finance and wealth is concerned, its make or break time.  Oh, and the crazy, eyebrow raising and funny experiments you’re going to do with food, when you return for 2nd term at Berkshire in Sept, will later on in life make you a guy who can cook impressively – the creativity and no-short-of-magic will work with them each time.

 

Achievement Award for 2012

The desire to succeed in life has always been the fire or flame inside me.  No matter what it is, how trivial it is – I have the desire to succeed.  Those who know me spend their time around me and who generally come in and out of my environment will be all too familiar with this flame – it’s always burning.

This morning when I arrived into office we had our regular communications meeting – scheduled once every month for all managerial positions to attend to learn about developments, progress, issues, solutions and regular updates – I was presented with an ‘Achievement Award’ for 2012.  It came as a total shock and surprise to me when the chair of the meeting and regional director announced my name, in front of approximately 30 other managers seated and another 10 or 20 who attended via video conference, called me up and handed me the award certificate.

The wording on the certificate said “Achievement Award – awarded for dedication and perseverance resulting in 100% successful project/assignment delivery this calendar year”, and with this came a high street voucher for £250.  During the meeting one more person was given an achievement award.

Since then, it’s dawned upon me that although I was engulfed and indulged in the daily grind of ensuring those projects under my management were on track to be delivered and where I fought endlessly to ensure the projects didn’t derail – it took someone else to recognise my hard work, dedication and desire to succeed, and it felt good and valued.

During 2012, I successfully delivered 3 projects which ran parallel to one another, and delivered 4 major milestones with our ongoing main healthcare contract – total value of these projects for 2012 hits approximately £4.7 million.  My previous best in 2010 was £4.2 million.

Although this certificate indicates that I exceed expectation of my targets that were set, my annual performance review is already looking promising.  What helped my confidence was the regional manager who later approached me at my office and congratulate me in person hinted to ensure I get prepared for my annual appraisal which to me indicates towards two things pay increase and promotion to the next tier above, something which my manager hinted in November last year.

I’m in my office, with this certificate on my desk and I’m wondering whether I could do this again – whether I could beat my 2012 best efforts of delivering projects beyond £4.7 million worth?

All I can say is this – I have the desire to succeed.

Pakistan vs India

This post isn’t about a cricket game between these two great nations, although I wish it was.  It’s very unfortunate that I start the year with a blog post of such nature, but I feel I need to express my views on a situation which potentially can escalate out of control.

India and Pakistan – The British Asian Blog

In the last few days, tension between India and Pakistan has risen to a dangerous level, and the dangerous level between these two nuclear armed neighbours could potentially escalate into a regional war and bring further insecurity to this region.

I have returned from India just this weekend, after spending the entire December in Bangalore and Mumbai.  This news first popped up on the radar on Sunday, when I was about to fly out of Bangalore to Manchester via a complicated-connecting flights, and instantly I realised that this was news that is likely to escalate, especially the way the media in India was so aggressively reporting.

India and Pakistan have lived together as one nation peacefully before.  If it wasn’t for the ‘border’ which divides this nation into two – I believe these two countries (as one) would/could have been a serious contender for the worlds ‘next super power’.  But you see, those who occupied India (the British) new of its potential and what it had to offer – fearing what could or can become in the future, they decided that while they made preparations to leave – they would leave a gift for this nation, a gift which would simply keep their power, focus and attention concentrated in its own territory forgetting about the rest of the world.  This great gift came into two parts – the first part of the gift was the border and the second part of the gift was Kashmir.

Since the British exited from India, their gift to this nation has done exactly what they expected it to do.  The border has divided a nation into two and Kashmir has been a place where both sides will not lose at any cost.

The recent events along the line of control between Pakistan and India has made me nervous – especially in the sense of what this can lead to if either side refuses to back down or avoid escalation of the issue.  Now, some may argue that India started this aggression and provoked Pakistan into reacting others may argue that it was Pakistan who first crossed the line of control (LOC) into India – and to be fair, neither side will gain anything positive out of this but those who gifted this nation the border are probably sat back, sipping a cup of tea and having a laugh at the expense of India and Pakistan.

I don’t want to see these two great nations, armed to the teeth, ready to rip each other apart.  I don’t want to see the development of both nations hindered to its borders when the world has become a smaller place.  I definitely don’t want to see sectarian and religious violence to erupt especially since all religions have co-existed peacefully for centuries and the very fact that all religions in the region are prospering to this very day is a testament in itself of peaceful co-existence between them.

As a British Asian, I find it difficult to stomach how these two nations have been divided and that the only things which have come out of it are brutality, war, instability and arrogance.

Let there be love for two brothers separated by a wall.

2012: Year in Review ‘no end’

It wasn’t so long ago, that I was reviewing year 2011 – and for the life of me I can’t work out where a whole year has gone.  I now write a review (in the shortest way possible) for year 2012.

Firstly and most importantly:  All praise is to the Lord above, who has yet again blessed me and continues to do so.  Not only do I remember ‘you my Lord’ for when times are hard and for when in trouble or for when evil surrounds me, but for when you bestow upon me happiness and success in wherever my focus goes, and for this, ‘I am ever indebted to you my Lord’.

With all new chapters and new starting points in life, I like to start with a little prayer.  The previous paragraph is my attempt to say thank you to my Lord.  In my view, words cannot express the humbleness, gratitude and appreciation that I have for everything in my life.  It’s easy to fall into a habit of calling upon the Lord in hardship and when in trouble, but it’s hard to remain focused and thank the Lord for when we are happy, successful and trouble free, and this, in my view, is key.

As I write this post on my iPad, the time is 7:50pm here in Mumbai.  I’m, alone, in probably the highest building which has an open top roof bar.  I’m sat in Aer Lounge, in what is known as ‘Sunset Happy Hour’ at the 34th floor open air lounge in Four Seasons Hotel Mumbai.  I’ve made this a place which I visit regularly; at least every 2nd or 3rd day – and I love this place.  In fact, I am in love with India, with Mumbai, and with the hustle and bustle of the city (but not the crazy traffic during peak hours, honestly, I thought the traffic in Leeds was bad).  More about India in future posts.

I’ve just witnessed the sunset from this jaw dropping view.  I’ve sat here on this very spot probably about 12 times in the past 4 weeks – but today I came here alone, without my acquaintance or with my new friends that I have made here in Mumbai.  Today’s sunset was a different one.  It reminded me of how 2012 came and went, and it’s given me an opportunity to reflect on the highs and lows of 2012.

Don’t worry, I won’t bore you with my highs and lows for 2012, but what I will say is this:

2012 has been a year of great challenges.  I have deliberately made some tough decisions in pretty much all aspects of my life.  You could say, I deliberately and consciously decided to walk on a path that has been less treaded on, knowing that the journey via this route is unpredictable, more stressful and more dangerous, but I know the reward and satisfaction in the end is invaluable against the grave risks I have decided to take.

As for 2013, well, I know for sure that this year will be more challenging than 2012 or 2011 ever was or double of what I experienced last year.  I accept that.  I am willing to accept the challenges for this year and do what I do best ‘fight on’.

This blog will be the gateway for me to echo what is happening, the challenges I am facing and what I get up to. This blog in itself is yet another challenge for 2013, as I’m sure most of you will agree with me that finding the time to blog is a challenge in our busy and bustling lifestyles.  What keeps me energised and enthusiastic to continue blogging is you guys.  I have met some great bloggers and some fantastic people from all around the world through blogging – it is you guys that fuel me in continuing to share my stories, experiences and views.  You may or may not agree with my views and opinions but we are a community and I’m glad to be part of it.

With that I’d like to wish all of you a happy New Year.

Good Bye 2012 and Welcome 2013.

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